Handle with Care.....

We've had three days with echo. she is a dream come true. we just layed her down for the night. she cries for 2 seconds and then stops and we won't hear a peep out of her for the rest of the night. she was well loved and well trained at her orphanage. we can really tell.

today was not a very busy day. we met rebecca at 12:00 to eat lunch with a couple of families and then we met again at 3:00 at the police station to get her passport taken care of. it feels like every day is a day that I've waited so long to get to. it's refreshing and relieving to check it off my list! another step closer to bringing echo home!

in the last three days we've been able to spend a LOT of time with one another. time that i wish i could have had with each one of my other three children back in the states. heath and i spend countless moments on the floor with her, laughing, playing, singing. even when we aren't doing anything, we are all three together, huddled close together. we are still learning one another's smells, our touches, our smiles, laughter and cries. it's wonderful and it's exhausting.

yesterday and today, heath and i have felt overly comfortable at times with echo. we are such silly parents together. we sing, dance and get just plain wild at times. our three children are used to this.
they've grown up knowing that we are weird and loud and they love it.
you know how you are at home, you play games and make jokes that only you and your family can understand. well, we are no different. we've made the attempt to show that side of us. sometimes it goes over well and sometimes.....not so much. i've made the attempt to make up my songs and dances for her only to see her little face look at me as if to say, "you stupid american, why do you act that way". and there has been a time or two when we try to give her a kiss and it makes her cry. she is just not ready for such affection. but she's coming around to it. we get a smile more often than we did on the first day, by far! once she gets to know us more, she will be just as wild and crazy. we know it.

today we had lunch with a couple of other Lifeline families. echo was very busy in her chair. typical toddler. she wanted to get down and do more things, not just eat. it was a learning lesson for her.
after awhile, one of the asian ladies from Lifeline came to sit down beside us and talk to echo. echo smiled and put on the charm. Lily then asked if she could hold echo so i passed her over. shockingly, echo began to cry and reached out for me to grab her. she reached for me. she wanted me. her mom. the white lady that smells funny. me.
her mother. i pushed back tears and i reached for my baby in her time of distress. i looked over at heath who mouthed, "you are loving this". what can i say, a girl needs her mama, right?

in these moments that i see echo become sad, scared or nervous, i remember what a major transistion this is for her. how her whole world has been turned upside down. yes, she is brave and she has amazing strength and resiliance, but she is still a baby. a scared little girl who is trying to figure it all out. i'm so grateful that she already knows to reach for us in her times of fear and uncertainty. she knows that we are here to protect her. so, we'll keep dancing and singing, kissing and tickling and acting like the stupid americans. no matter how crazy she thinks we are, i kinda think she likes it. she warms up more every day. we just have to be patient and fight the urge to smother her in kisses and hugs, as painful as that might be at times. she is fragile. we have to handle this little one with care.